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13/08/2005
The bad mother handbook (Book Review)
The title, ‘The bad mother handbook’, made me pick up this book because I sometimes feel like I am a bad mother. And I am pretty sure I am not the only one who feels this way sometimes. It’s when our children pushes us to our limits that we react without thinking – in a humanly way that’s full of flaws. In fact, even mothers are not without flaws.
However, despite the title, ‘The bad mother handbook’, given to the book, this book is no self-help book or a guide of any kind, which was what I initially thought it was. It’s a novel. It’s a story about how three generations of mothers have come together in an understanding, how the past clouded the now and how the now can change the future.
The backdrop for this book was set in 1997, the year that the dearly beloved Princess Diana perished in a fatal car crash. It was also in this year that Nan (the grandmother) started showing signs of her age, Karen (the mother) discovers a secret that she never thought she wanted to find out about, and it is also during this year that Charlotte (the pregnant teen) is also about discover what it is to be a mother.
The continual swapping of storyline and outlook throughout the book was confusing for me in the beginning. I have to admit this, in the beginning, I was just leafing through the pages, disbelieving of the fact that I actually paid RM30+ to read all of this nonsensical stuff. Things that I already know very well, as a mother, thank you very much. Ironically, it was this swapping that got me hook later on in the book. So, essentially, in ‘The bad mother handbook’, there is not ONE main character, but there are three leading ladies! Once you get past the first few chapters and start to understand the characters, you’ll soon get into their lives and pray for them.
For Nan, it was difficult to understand the way her story was written because much of it was written in a kind of English that the English used to talk in. For Karen, it’s a very today thing since Karen does live in my generation. Well, maybe she’s a couple of years older than me (ahem!) but heck, I understand every single word that is written about her and the things that she is going through. For Charlotte, she’s just a typical teenager who’s just fuming mad because of her mom’s behavior and refusal to be more relaxed about her. Charlotte was basically rebelling and acted outrageously because Karen was tuned out of her life. The mother and daughter stopped speaking to each other because they couldn’t see eye to eye about almost everything! The moment one of them opened their mouths, the other picks it up as an argument. How it reminds me of my teenage years. Karen, in the meantime, is hung-up on the mistake that she has made in the past – particularly, in getting pregnant, getting married, getting divorced and missing out on her education, having to live through each day in a dreary mood in an awful job she hates!
Because of this mistake, she wants only the best for Charlotte and imagine what she felt when Charlotte fell into the very footstep she took – in getting pregnant? And the father of the child is less than responsible towards the pregnancy. In the meantime, Karen goes on a quest to discover her true lineage and Charlotte finds a new friend and best buddy in the most unlikely boy in the whole school. His devotion and friendship (and adoration) got her through most of the tough times written about very realistically in ‘The bad mother handbook’.
It’s not as witty and page-turning as I thought it was going to be but all in all, Kate Long has written a truly well-loved book in the form of ‘The bad mother handbook’. It’s definitely a good read but don’t expect Kay Scarpetta stuff in there. read leisurely and you will soon see the true value of a book like ‘The bad mother handbook’. Well done, Kate Long.
12:47 Posted in Books | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
12/08/2005
The sun is out again!
<Look at the pictures! Man, you can actually see quite far into the distance, as compared to the pictures that I posted yesterday! There's still slight haziness but this is definitely better than NOTHING.>
I can’t believe it! I can actually see the sun shining through the slight smog today! Man, am I happy that this cloud of haze is finally lifting off of our heads. I can actually breathe without going into a fit of coughing spree now. Yipee!!! I don’t know if it’s too early to celebrate or not, but one day of reprieve is better than nothing. In fact, I feel good enough about this whole fog lifting that I resumed gym activities today.
Looking out into the streets when I open the door, I no longer smell burning crops, but there’s a lot of fresh air coming in now, but with a slight tinge of smoke still hanging there. The top part of the sky is still grayish and somewhat hazy, but it’s still better than yesterday. The clothes that we brought in from drying no longer smell of burning rubbish!
(picture: Look, you can actually see the top of the trees and into the kampung! Where's the champagne bottle?)
And the most important thing is that I can finally smile again! And they say smiling is good, right? Yeah…I can finally smile again.
Apparently, even the areas where the air quality was said to be ‘hazardous’ is seeing a better day today. Like Port Klang, Shah Alam, and Kuala Selangor where the API was recorded at more than 500. We had 326 yesterday. Imagine, theirs is almost double of what we were experiencing, man!
Well, as it gets better for us here on the South West area of Malaysia, it’s getting worse for those in the North. Penang, the pearl of Malaysia, is being hit with the remnants of haze that enveloped us earlier. But I don’t think they have anything to worry about since we’ve sucked in most of the hazardous particles already. J So, Penang, Prai, Bayan Lepas, Alor Setar….hang in there! Our visibility was about 1km yesterday, but theirs are still at about 3km, 10km, and 5km, so, we’ll see how things go for them.
<As I peeked around the corner into the back lane, I can see the house behind the row of houses behind my house. If I crane my neck far off the balcony, I can actually see a little bit of the playground behind my house>
Accordingly, the number of hotspots in Malaysia and Indonesia has significantly reduced. Satelite images showed 700+ hotspots in Riau alone, 206 hotspots in North Sumatra, and about 10+ hotspots in Malaysia.
:: Marsha
Air quality improves in haze emergency areas
11:00 Posted in Blog | Permalink | Comments (2) | Email this
11/08/2005
No escape from haze!
<Above pictures are taken about 30 - 45 mins before I wrote this blog> Take a look at the picture posted yesterday. It's even worse today!
If the condition yesterday was bad, today, it seems it’s worse. It’s so bad that the government has decided to declare that schools are to be closed for 2 days – at least! That’s being optimistic because I don’t think we’re expecting the haze to go away so soon. The smell of burning smoke penetrates even our air-conditioning systems and coming into the homes. So, even if we’re quarantined within the confines of our own home, we’re not safe….not anymore!
As I look around me, things are fuzzy everywhere. Everywhere! I turn the air-condition on all the time (poor air-conditioner) and the air-ventilation is also on in the bathroom. But I don’t think it’s helping anything at all….
I can feel an itch crawling into my system and into my throat now – as I choke and cough at the very ‘sight’ of smoke in the house. The kids are, of course, totally oblivious and continue to be as active as ever. One or two of them have succumbed to illnesses but the rest are as hyper as ever. They don’t know how dangerous it is for them to breathe. Imagine this…breathing is dangerous. I have cancelled my plans to visit the gym for 2 days in a row now because of this haze. If the smoke can get into my home, the smoke can get to the gym. Therefore, exercising at this point in time is a no-go. I miss the gym. Not a health or fitness fanatic but I really like exercising and sweating it out a little very early in the morning. I come home totally fresh and ready to rock! Now, I wake up feeling trapped in a world that is killing me.
And today the government has finally revealed that the air in Malaysia is hazardous. Previously, the air pollution index was not released because of unknown reasons but today, the government has finally released the information out to the public so that we are warned that we are breathing air that KILLS! Before this, we’ve identified only a couple of cities and areas whereby the haze has hit, but now, the government says that there are more haze-affected areas than they first thought.
Between healthy, unhealthy, very unhealthy and hazardous, we’re now reaching the ‘hazardous’ mark. The source of the haze, Sumatra, has offered apologies and given us their comfort that they are trying their best to douse the fires....but it's doing nothing, in my eyes! At this stage, at the stage of a national emergency, saying 'SORRY' is NOT ENOUGH! Malaysians don't want apologies, we want ACTION! Douse the fire now, or else! Well, or else tens of thousands of young lives are going to bear the stupid consequences of some individuals and government officials who knows nothing about doing their job!!
Not only is it affecting health and lives, it's affecting the entire country's economics too. Now, tell me how SORRY is going to cut it? Are they going to replace the number of lives that are affected by their stupid actions? Are they going to reimburse us for the economical loss? Are they going to bring our tourist industry back on its feet again? Are they going to do ANYTHING at all?
Indonesia sucks!! I don't care what Indonesians think at this point in time. Their lackadaisical attitude in dealing with this issue is causing us grief. Angry, yes I am! So, sue me!!!!
08:20 Posted in Blog | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
10/08/2005
Dooms Day
Picture on left was taken about 2 minutes ago before I started writing this blog entry. This picture was taken outside the house on the balcony. As you can see (or maybe not cause the picture is too small), there's really nothing you can see outside the house.
Things here have been nothing short of SUCKY!! The weather totally, totally, totally sucks and I want, really, really REALLY want to run away. I was just reading the papers about the haze in Malaysia (in particular, Klang Valley) and was hoping that things would get better once the authorities starts taking action and then by afternoon, when I was picking the kids up from school, everything plummets down from bad to worse. I don't think I have seen a worse level of haze.
Some years back, there was haze too but then it wasn't this bad. Or was it because I didn't have kids to worry about, then, that it didn't really look all that bad. I dunno. I can't help thinking that this is the way the entire human race is going to be eliminated. This is it - this is dooms day. First to go...people in Klang Valley, Petaling Jaya, Selangor, Malaysia!
All because of the fact that some irresponsible people are burning stuff in Indonesia and Malaysia.
I look out and I see nothing but death....a very slow, painful death...choking death. Can you blame me? I feel so trapped and helpless, not knowing what to do. I can't very well leave everything here and go somewhere else. Last I heard, the haze was spreading to northern parts of the country as well, but I don't think they've got it as bad as we have it here. But I wish I could go somewhere, temporarily.....but I can't. Cause there's just so much work to do, you know.
Look at all those people who have to remain outdoors the whole time because of work. The people who sweeps the roads, the construction workers, the people who man shops that are open-aired, people walking to the bus-stop, people going out for lunch, people walking to their cars in far-off carparks....etc. There's nothing we can do but sit here and breathe in the horrid, acrid-smelling air and pollute our lungs. Worse yet, pollute the lungs of our children, knowing full well that there is nothing we can do.....ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
I seriously hope tomorrow will be better. But according to the papers, we have to wait out the whole thing. Wait for the wind to change direction. But this ain't happening until somewhere in October. In the meantime, we're sitting here, waiting for the fires in Sumatra and Malaysia to stop.
This is like living in HELL.
More News:-
Indonesian forest fires again cause haze in Malaysia
Associated Press
August 4, 2005
Indonesia confirms Sumatra's forest fire toward Malaysia
Fires return in Indonesia, haze hits Malaysia
Sumatra forest fire haze spreads
Somebody please kill all those people who are burning crops in the middle of nowhere causing just aggravation to innocent people like us!!!!
marsha
07:40 Posted in Blog | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
08/08/2005
Some good quotes to share
I just went through my collection of fab quotes that I have found and saved over the years and here are a couple that I would like to share with you.
“I haven't found Mr Right, but I have found Mr Cheap, Mr Sleazy and Mr Wrong.” Now, tell me this quote isn’t spot on!! Along the way, I’ve found some nice guys who didn’t fit the bill, some guys who didn’t fit the shoe and I’ve also found Mr. Cheap, Mr. Sleazy and definitely a truckload of Mr. Wrongs!!
Be careful whose toes you step on today, they might be attached to the ass you have to kiss tomorrow. That’s the reason why I no longer work for anyone today. I don’t like to kiss ass – and I don’t. Period.
Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hairstyle you like. I NEVER, NEVER, NEVER get the hairstyle I want. I go into the hair salon all chatty, friendly and very, very elaborate in describing how I want my new hairstyle to be and yet I walk out looking like my hair exploded.
"So many cheques, so little money." Boy, oh boy. I realized this only when I started working from home. Piles of cheques that totals right about $12.34 or something like that…..gggrrrrr….
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. – I said this to my son once and he gave me a raised eyebrow. And then I realized what I just said. Gee, talk about oxymoron.
Born free... Taxed to death. – Ever wondered what you would do with all those money if you didn’t have to pay tax?
Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any. – Can’t get any real than this. But then again, this is true for almost anything else in life, isn’t it?
You're just jealous cause the voices only talk to me. – Remember Joan of Arc?
20:47 Posted in Leisure | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
Living in a fog
This is like an epidemic that you know you cannot run away from. I want to take my kids out of the country or out of this world because the haze here is so bad that every time I get outdoors, I start coughing and sneezing. It’s THAT bad. Too bad I live where the country is worst hit – Petaling Jaya. How come PJ is always the worst hit whenever there’s haze? But of course, I’d take haze instead of tsunami, of course.
Dry weather and low rainfall seem to make matters worse. It has been, what, about a week now since the first sign of haze hit the country? And the hotspots are still burning hot! When is all this ever going to end? It feels like the end of the world or something, you know. You can’t run away from the weather, you can run away or hide from germs but you cannot run away from the environment.
Because of this damn haze, there have been a rising number of patients complaining of cough, flu, asthma, running nose and sore throat. I mean, who wouldn’t when you look at the kind of haze here. You walk out and you see nothing but a fog. This is the only time that it feels like you’re in Genting but you’re not.
As a mother, you don’t mind living in such a horrible condition yourself, after all, you’ve lived half your life and there’s only halfway more to go. But for the kids – you feel like you’ve brought them into a world that is nothing to be proud of, you know what I mean? They’ve been born into and bred in a dying world. And that’s kind of sad. You want to give them the best and yet, the world cannot afford what you want to give them.
At this point in time, I guess the only thing that I (or anyone else) can do is to reduce their outdoor activities and to bring them out as little as possible. Even when you’re indoors, you can smell the burning smell. It’s EVERYWHERE!! The kids get bored when they’ve been indoors for a long period of time and we cannot help it for the time when they’re in school. And since Joshua has wheezing, I am afraid that he will start having an attack in school because of the quality of air.
Let’s hope all this burning stops and the air returns to normal again. Even if it’s really hot and humid – it’s better than this.
15:00 Posted in Blog | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this