Marsha Maung:: Freelance graphic designer and writer

Things I learnt after moving out of the safe confines of in-laws’ home and my own home.

 

1. When using plastic gloves to wash dishes, you lose the use of your touch (feel) faculty. Use eyes when washing dishes.

 

2. Dust is not only on your PC. Dust is EVERYWHERE.

 

3. Ants are hateful creatures. Worse than vultures! And worse yet, they are also very vengeful. Kill one hundred of their brothers (or sisters), a thousand of their kind will come raid your kitchen and dustbins. Thankfully, ants are not very smart creatures. They don’t know and can’t remember what a mortein (insect killer) can looks like.

 

4. It takes so painfully long to cook, and very short time to eat (spill, throw, stuff in fridge)

 

5. Each component in a cuisine (albeit dish) is delicately handcrafted by an art master. Read: Have to cut carrot, potato, onion, garlic, vegetable, and whateverelsethereisinthedumbdish each one individually one meh? Cannot cut all at one go?? Someone should design something like this.

 

6. There’s a very important reason why knives are made sharp – they CUT!!! Wash and use carefully.

 

7. Clothes don’t wash, dry, fold and return themselves to closet without human intervention

 

8. The toilet don’t flush, wash and clean itself. Keep soap at safe height.

 

9. One can actually get bored of canned food. (amazing discovery here. I thought we could actually feed the kids canned food until they are 18)

 

10. Food doesn’t grow in fridges and freezers.

I wonder if I am the only one on the planet that feels like holidays are…such a complete waste of time. Admittedly, I am one of those workaholics who cannot sit, stand, lie or squat still for a very long time. No, not a hyperactive person, but I do like being useful or doing something.

 

Therefore, holidays are always a bore to me. Strangely enough, when I was in school, I would end up going to school just to play or practice something. You know, in school, we always have this extra-curricular stuff going at one point or the other. And when I was working, I would end up spending more hours in the office during holidays than during the normal working days! Strange creature…me.

 

And it’s no different now that I am a mother and freelancer.

 

Having the kids home with me all the time is god-send. I mean, this is what I want – to have them with me and I have all the time in the world to spend with them, tickle them and play catch with them, enjoy their laughter and also to break up their fights. But heck, when in the world is the holiday going to end??!!! I have to get them out of my hair soon otherwise, I am never going to get any work done at all!

 

Sadly, even during the Chinese New Year, when just about every single Chinese in the world is taking a holiday or enjoying themselves, I am here, mulling over websites, articles and brochures!

 

Am I the only person in the world who doesn’t like holidays?

 

In fact, I spend so much more money during the holidays because I have to take the kids out all the time – they get bored pretty easily sitting at home, it seems. So, there we go strolling aimlessly around every shopping mall nearby and breaking every see saw and swing in every garden we find, stuffing our faces with pizzas, spaghettis, lasagnas and other out-of-the-budget food during the holidays is….well, something I can do without.

 

I can’t wait for school to start so that they can have their life back (they might disagree with me) and get off Astro Playhouse Disney and Cartoon Network and I can get some things done here. Otherwise, my clients are going to have my sorry behind for dinner!

It’s the new year, the end of holidays for Malaysian kids and the beginning of a harrowing experience for new students – and the teachers! You won’t envy their job at the beginning of the year – especially if they’re teaching NURSERY.


Anyway, under normal circumstance, Jared is quite independent although sometimes quite clinghy, but he’s adapted to his school environment and understands the concept of ‘mommy coming back for you later’.

But the sad thing is that while he has adapted to his old school, he’s in a new school this year. We’re moving to a new condo this month (probably mid or end of the month) and it would be more convenient for both Joshua and Jared to attend the same school. Hence, I’ve taken Jared out from his old school and both my boys are enrolled with the same school.

I know I half expected Jared to accept the fact that he’s in a new school with new teachers and new friends easily…but that was naïve and wishful thinking. He cried and bawled senselessly and refused to quite down. The moment I said, “Mommy will come back for you later, ok?”, he would grab my thigh and cling dramatically to my leg.

But I’ve seen Joshua do this before and Jared wasn’t exactly easy going when he first started school, so, I know for a fact that you have to be cruel in order to be kind. You see, I remember the second day of Joshua’s school year (first time entering school and all) where he was thrashing around on the floor of the kindergarten when I tried to leave. His teacher tried to pick him up and he gave his teacher a nasty bonk on the nose! But the teachers assured me that he will be alright in 5 minutes. I wasn’t too sure. I stuck around outside, playing pink panther hiding behind trees and slides, spying on the status of my little boy in school.

Well, Joshua can throw a worse tantrum that any other kid I know, so, I was worried the teacher was going to peg him to the door by the back of his uniform or something. But none of that happened, of course. What actually happened was that, I spent approximately 10 minutes in hiding outside watching his eyes, nose and ears turn red with crying and then suddenly, like something snapped, he stopped, looked around and realized that HECK, mom’s stopped coming in the door….so…..the drama can stop too.

And with amazement, I watched as he colored stuff. Occasionally, he turned around towards the door and the teacher stops him. He sniffs and cries pitifully again but then always resumes his position and started doing some work again. That was the second day. He cried a total of 1 hour, I think. The third day, he cried all of ten minutes and even sang some songs. The fourth day, he sniffed at the door but waved goodbye as I drove away. And the fifth day…is history. When I changed him to a new school, he didn’t really cry either.

Jared, on the other hand, is a little bit younger than Joshua when the transition was made. Yesterday was traumatic because I hung around. Today, I went in, took him to class, spent 2 minutes reassuring him that I will be back and then just left. I heard his bawling and his ‘I want to go home!’ and ‘I want my mommy!’ but decidedly and purposefully walked out of the door.

In the case of first day of school jitters, let me issue a reminder to all parents – make the life of the teachers and the children easier. The longer you hang around, the worse it will be. Trust me, the moment you turn around, they’re going to adapt.

A very sordid scenario and example of how to be CRUEL in order to be KIND. If you love your child and want him to stop crying, turn around, walk out of the door, shut your ears and then don’t look back.

Oh, you can promise gifts and presents if you want but- after school and if there’s no crying. Works every time!!!